There’s an episode of the t.v. sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond where main characters Ray and Debra Barone are attending a parent-teacher conference. Their twin boys’ teacher is displaying their sons’ schoolwork side by side and it becomes painfully obvious that while one twin has mastered pre-K, the other twin has struggled quite a bit. Ray and Debra are faced with three choices: a) hold the struggling twin back in pre-K another year while the other twin progresses, b) hold both twins back another year to avoid separating them, or c) pass both of them on to Kindergarten and hope the struggling twin catches up.
Ray and Debra listen helplessly as their options are laid out. At first they question the teacher’s strategy, but they’re at a disadvantage because they aren’t in the classroom. Interestingly, it’s the end of the school year, but neither parent had any clue that their son was struggling in school. Finally, they resign themselves to the teacher’s recommendations and wait to hear what the final decision of the school will be concerning their twins’ future.
When they return home, Raymond frantically tries to teach the struggling twin to cut with scissors in a futile attempt to compensate for a school years’ worth of leaving his son’s education in the hands of a virtual stranger, just so his child can “pass”. Ray’s parents come over to visit and reveal that as a child Ray was held back a year in preschool with similar developmental struggles. By the end of the show, the school decides to hold both boys back in pre-K. Ray and Debra console themselves that the most important thing for the twins is that they are happy and healthy.
I’ve been that helpless parent sitting in a parent-teacher conference listening to my child’s deficits from a teacher who has and sometimes hasn’t had their best interests at heart. I’ve experienced the frustration of being shut out of my child’s education. I’ve been at the mercy of an overworked, underpaid teacher who didn’t have the time, resources, or energy to daily keep me abreast of what was being taught or how it was being taught so that I could assist my child.
I’ve inwardly questioned the ethics and beliefs of my child’s teacher and how those beliefs were influencing the classroom. I’ve been discouraged when I thought my child was being unfairly labeled and dismissed because they failed to progress at the rate the teacher felt they should have. I’ve also sat on the other side of the parent-teacher conference table. I’ve been the overworked, underpaid teacher working with parents to ensure their child succeeds. I’ve personally witnessed the unfair labels and low expectations applied to certain students. I’ve seen school administrators undermine and usurp parental authority.
I’ve spoken with kids who hunger for the truth of the Gospel, yet felt my hands were tied because the name of Jesus is virtually banned from public school hallways. I’ve walked the hallways and wanted to cry at the rampant lawlessness I saw, worrying about the futures of the kids that milled around me and what the state of affairs will be when my kids reach high school age. Would they hold on to their Christian faith amidst all the ungodly influences or would they fall away, choosing to follow the secularism they’d learned from the place they’d spent the majority of their waking hours?
Naturally my worries and concerns as both a parent and teacher gave way to depression until God in his kindness and mercy called my husband and I to homeschool our children. Nearly six years later, homeschooling has been a blessing beyond measure. Don’t get me wrong, I have challenging days, but the rewards have far outweighed the challenges. Here are three blessings we’ve experienced:
