It’s a cliché nowadays to say our children are a blessing when our society treats them as anything but. If we take our cues from social media, our kids are such burdens that we celebrate when they go to school after the summer, become alcoholics because we constantly drink wine to cope with dealing with them, and are constantly inventing new ways to escape them within our homes. I get that it’s all meant to be a joke–but in every joke lies a grain of truth. And the truth is we don’t value our children the way that God wants us to value them.
I'm Guilty Too
If I sound the least bit self-righteous let me dispel the air of superiority right now—not only have I guffawed and laughed right along with everyone else, but I shared a similar mindset when I was in the workforce.
Of course I loved my kids, but the majority of my relationship with my children amounted to a task list to be completed before they went to bed and readied for the next school day, a rushed conversation on the car ride home, a hug and a kiss between homework, baths, and the myriad of daily activities to be accomplished.
Then a troubling realization began to slowly dawn on me. I was teaching high school kids and I ran across so many kids who were essentially raising themselves. Many of them lived completely separate lives from their parents and were directionless. They hungered for truth, attention, guidance—many things that from their conversation and observing them were lacking in their homes. While these observations made me that much more sympathetic towards my students, it also greatly troubled me on an introspective level. My kids, who I love so much, spent most of their day away from me and under the influence of virtual strangers each day. Add up all the hours spent away, and by the time they reached high school, they were bound to look like some of the kids I came across at school.
Then I began to examine our lifestyle period. Our schedule was demanding with little room for error. I was always focused on the next destination or the next task to be accomplished, but after all the tasks had been checked off for the day, how well did I know my kids? How much quality time did we actually spend together each day? I saw little things that bothered me about their habits and attitudes that needed to be addressed over time, but how much time did I really have to devote to their instruction? I witnessed constantly, the vacuum in many of my student’s lives because Jesus was a nonentity in them, but weren’t my own kids on a similar path? I finally came to the conclusion—God forbid I teach other people’s kids, while my own kids are neglected.
Let me clarify what I mean when I say “neglected”. Yes, they were well cared for in a temporal sense. They went to school, I was on top of their school work, and they were fed, clothed and groomed well. We even went to church each Sunday, but I wanted so much more than what we were currently giving them. In every nearly every facet of their lives, someone else was responsible for what God in his Word said that my husband and I are responsible for.
They were getting an education that left Jesus out of history, out of math, out of science, out of language arts, out of character education, out of everything that he is a part of, yet they were supposed to be getting a complete education? I saw gaps in their learning that I had to try to fill blindly because I wasn’t in the classroom aware of how topics were begin taught or privy to lesson plans. I was just supposed to trust that the school was on top of things. I was in high school and I saw how well they were on top of things.
Most of all, I realized that even though the Bible says that our children are blessings, I wasn’t getting to enjoy my little blessings—someone else was, someone who probably couldn’t fully appreciate them.
Fast-forward to homeschool and I came to see that my kids were people with different personalities and different needs. I’ve come to appreciate each one for who they are as little humans made in God’s image. Once I started to see them the way God sees them, their value skyrocketed. They were no longer a series of tasks to be completed, but children to be discipled in the faith, instructed in academics, invested in for the future. They are my first ministry.
Now when I see the Scripture that says “Children are a blessing” I have a deeper understanding of what that means because I experience my little blessings every day all day. My life is richer for having them and it took homeschooling to help me see that.
